Punology

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My dear friend RB sent me these puns. Normally, I find puns corny, but these struck me as particularly clever. See what you think:

I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I never met herbivore.
I am reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
They told me I had Type A blood, but it was a Type O.
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
PMS jokes aren’t funny. Period.
Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
I’m going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there’s no pop quiz.
The Energizer Bunny was arrested, charged with battery.
I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
What does a clock do when it’s hungry? It goes back four seconds.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Broken pencils are pointless.

You may now groan.

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Filed under All things having to do with the English language

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